


All I Need

by SouldierToTheEnd



Category: Dishonored (Video Games)
Genre: Consent Issues, DOTO compliant, Dishonored 2, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Low Chaos (Dishonored), Low Chaos Emily Kaldwin, Secret Identity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-19
Updated: 2017-09-19
Packaged: 2018-12-31 12:57:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12132993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SouldierToTheEnd/pseuds/SouldierToTheEnd
Summary: Emily had been acting strange ever since she came back from Stilton’s mansion. Granted, the former empress had always been an odd one: sleepwalking on the deck, staring at her cupped hand and whispering to it, and at one point, sunbathing topless after a particularly stressful night. She didn't act like a lady of her class should, always grimy and too quick-tempered. It was probably why Meagan liked her more than she thought she would.Meagan knew she shouldn't get attached to Emily -- she did kill her mother after all, a lifetime ago.





	All I Need

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not entirely satisfied with this, but I decided to publish it anyway. The world needs more of this ship and I'm annoyed it isn't more popular. Also, while I've ensured that this story is canon compliant with Death of the Outsider, I haven't finished that game so there are only light spoilers of DOTO (like within the first mission kind of spoilers). Note that there are some consent issues related to one person not knowing the true identity of the other. Enjoy.

Emily had been acting strange ever since she came back from Stilton’s mansion. Granted, the former empress had always been an odd one: sleepwalking on the deck, staring at her cupped hand and whispering to it, and at one point, sunbathing topless after a particularly stressful night. She didn't act like a lady of her class should, always grimy and too quick-tempered. It was probably why Meagan liked her more than she thought she would.

Meagan knew she shouldn't get attached to Emily -- she did kill her mother after all, a lifetime ago.

Right after the mission, when Meagan and Anton took her on the skiff back to the ship, she was quiet and contemplative. She answered their questions curtly and a few times Meagan caught her looking at her right arm. And the next morning, when Stilton came aboard the Dreadful Wale to discuss what he remembered of the seance, Emily stared at him unabashedly.

“Let her have her own secrets,” Anton said when Meagan pointed it out to him. “The world is a strange place.”

On this night, Meagan was lounging on the deck, trying to enjoy the tranquil air. They had spent the past few days scoping out the Duke’s palace, finding the best routes for Emily to navigate the district. They were close to ending this coup. Maybe she would go back to the boring existence of a boat captain. Maybe she would accompany Anton to wherever he planned to leave to after this. Meagan never did like being alone.

She tore her gaze away from the stars and glanced towards the end of the ship, where she could see Emily creeping towards her, cloaked in the shadows, her eyes unreadable. It might have been years since Meagan held a blade, but her senses were always finely attuned, no matter how much she aged. When Emily realized she'd been caught, she straightened and strode the rest of the way, her footsteps landing heavily on the creaky wood.

“Are you asleep again?” Meagan said dryly. She held a fig in her hands, absent-mindedly peeling it with a knife.

“It only happened once,” she muttered as she drew closer.

“Multiple times. You woke me up every time.”

Emily sat down in the vacant seat next to her, where Anton was slouched in before he retired for the night. She was staring at Meagan’s hands again as they sliced open the fruit. Meagan wished she would just say whatever it was on her mind. It would have been better than being constantly scrutinized.

“You want one?”

Emily shrugged but reached out a hand anyway as Meagan handed her half of the fig. She popped it into her mouth and sucked at it, some of the juice escaping out one corner of her mouth. Meagan looked away as Emily wiped the excess with her thumb.

“Tomorrow’s the last night,” Emily said as she leaned back to look at the sky.

“In Karnaca? I thought you'd be glad to get over this. Return to your charmed life, pretend this was all just a bad dream.” Meagan tried not to be bitter. By the look on Emily’s face, she wasn't entirely sure she succeeded.

“That's not what I was -- never mind.” And there she went again, cupping her hand again and staring at it like it held all the answers. At first Meagan thought she was staring at her mark, but it was her palm that was held up.

Meagan went back to her fruit and they sat in uneasy silence. After several long minutes, Emily wretched her arm away and looked up again.

“I don't even know if my father is still alive,” she whispered. Meagan pretended not to notice her eyes were watering.

“You told me he was imprisoned.”

“Delilah turned him to stone. I… am not sure I can change him back.” She blinked her eyes rapidly and turned her head to face Meagan. “I know I shouldn't complain, and that others have gone through worst, but I still miss my parents. I miss my mother.” Emily smiled weakly. “I miss her laughter, her warm embraces.”

Meagan shifted uncomfortably. Of all things she expected, she didn't expect Emily to start baring her soul. Emily barely talked to her most days and now she acted like they knew each other intimately. She silently pleaded to someone that Emily would stop talking.

“It's hard to sleep, too,” Emily added.

Meagan snorted. “Too used to having someone there to warm your bed?”

“Well. Yes. Usually a beautiful woman.” Emily laughed when Meagan fell silent, surprised. “Oh come on, I know it's not that shocking. Plenty of rumors about it.”

“Rumors?” Meagan echoed.

“Some of the older ladies at court are absolutely scandalized, I'm told.” Emily smiled, almost sweetly, at Meagan. As if she was still the child empress. As if Meagan hadn't seen her behead someone once. “I'm not used to being without companionship for so long.”

Meagan tried really hard not to imagine that. She failed. She couldn't be blamed though; she did see Emily topless before. “Well I'm sure soon you won't have to sleep alone for much longer.”

Emily’s smile slipped and she sighed heavily. “Meagan, I've seen how you look at me, when you think I don't notice. I know you can't sleep well either.”

“Is this supposed to be an attempt at seduction?” Meagan asked incredulously. Her face was heating up, she could feel it, but thankfully her dark complexion hid it well. “Not everyone will be falling over themselves to sleep with you, majesty.”

“You're right,” Emily said after a pause. “A different approach…?” Her hands slipped to her shirt and began to unbutton it.

“Stop that,” Meagan hissed. She grabbed at Emily’s hand just as it was about to undo her brassiere. “This is a terrible idea.”

Emily’s hand moved to hold hers instead, stroking the rough skin over her knuckles. Meagan was too old for this. “Why?”

 _Because I helped kill your mother._ “Because you're royalty and I'm a commoner.”

“Hasn't stopped me before,” Emily said. When Meagan stared curiously, she added, “Fugue Feast.”

“I'm too old for you.”

“Always liked older people.”

Meagan stared at her helplessly. Emily smiled at her gently and patted her hand. She wished Emily was her old brooding self; at least then she knew how to react to her. “I'm going back to my room,” Emily said. “You can join me, if you want. If you don’t, then we'll pretend none of this ever happened.” Emily kissed her hand before dropping it and stood up, walking into the interior without looking back.

If Meagan was smart, if she had any ounce of decency, she would stay in her seat and spend the night staring at the stars. The next day they would be back at playing the roles of polite but distant allies. Eventually, this night would feel like a dream to Meagan, like it never really happened.

But she want it to have happened.

She next found herself in front of Emily’s room, her hand raised halfway up to knock, desperately trying to convince herself to go back to her own room.

_I helped kill your mother._

What was wrong with her?

Her hand pounded on the door before she could talk herself out of it and barely a second later it swung open. Emily grinned when she saw her, tucking her long, now loose hair behind an ear. She evidently finished undressing when she came back to her room, with no stitch of cloth on her frame.

“Was wondering when you were gonna knock,” she confessed as she moved back, allowing space for Meagan to come in. “Thought about getting started without you.”

Emily moved in closer, her breasts pressing against Meagan’s front. She unbuttoned Meagan’s shirt and pushed it off her shoulders, licking her lips when she saw Meagan’s bare chest. Before she lost her nerve, Meagan leaned in to capture her lips.

Meagan wasn't sure why she expected Emily to acquiesce to her kisses; of course Emily kissed like it was a battle, hard and dominating. Emily’s hands slipped to Meagan’s waist, unbuttoning her trousers, slipping her hand in to cup at her mound. Meagan groaned into the kiss.

Emily pulled away, her pupils wide and her lips red and shiny. “Lay on the cot.”

Meagan shucked her trousers off and followed her orders. The cot was small and she wasn't entirely sure how they would both be able to fit, but she knew her empress wouldn't allow such a detail to impede her plans.

_Billie, you sentimental fool._

Emily climbed in after her, laying herself directly on top of Meagan, their bodies molding together. Emily licked inside her mouth, teasingly, before she crawled down the cot until she was facing Meagan’s groin.

Meagan shifted to part her legs and Emily’s hands wrapped around her hips, steadying herself. Then she lowered her head.

Meagan gasped and tried to hold herself still. It was a rush, watching the empress essentially kneeling before her, intent on pleasuring her. She'd never expected this to happen.

And Emily was good at it. She knew where to flick her tongue, the pressure to use, the speed. She knew when to back off and lick elsewhere, before returning to suck her into her mouth, her lips massaging the little bead. She stopped for a moment to catch her breath, looking up to gauge Meagan’s reaction. Meagan swallowed at the sight of her shiny lips and chin. Emily smirked before returning to her task.

It didn't take long for Meagan to be clutching at the pillow, gritting her teeth, trying to keep silent. Emily kept lapping at her, right at the most pleasurable place, and Meagan shuddered, her limbs seizing up as she rode out the waves of pleasure. She fell back against the cot, sucking in air desperately as Emily crawled back up her body. She molded their mouths together, her tongue pressing against hers, so Meagan could taste herself.

Her hands rose up to cup Emily’s breasts, thumbing her nipples, and Emily moaned into her lips, rocking her lower body against her. Meagan reached down with one hand to part through her curls and dip one finger into her. She was completely soaked.

“I thought about this,” Emily sighed. “I've wanted you for a long time.”

“You shouldn't,” Meagan said, even as she pressed another finger into her. Emily thrusted her hips and moaned again as the fingers inside slid even deeper. “You're going to regret this.”

“No.” Emily braced her hands against the cot and rocked against the hand, Meagan’s other hand still tweaking her nipple. “I want you.”

Meagan pulled her down to capture her lips again. She smothered Emily’s moans as she moved her fingers in her, fast and deep. She rubbed at the spongy part inside her and Emily cried out, moving desperately. Emily was shaking as she came, grinding her hips, holding tightly on to Meagan. She collapsed back down on top of her and laughed breathlessly, nuzzling into Meagan’s neck.

They laid there together for a long moment, catching their breaths. Emily adjusted herself to be more comfortable, wrapping her arms around Meagan, a contented sigh leaving her lips.

Meagan idly wondered how Daud would react if he knew what had just transpired.

She wrapped the strands of the empress’s hair ‘round her fingers, stroking the nape of her neck. “Why now?” she murmured.

She didn't expect Emily to respond. Her breathing had evened out, deepened as she anchored her weight on top of Meagan. Emily said, “I don't think we'll see each other once this is over.”

“You're just using me.”

“You are too.” Maybe, Meagan thought. But she couldn't ever mistake Emily for Deidre. Didn't want to. “But for what it's worth,” Emily continued, “I really do like you.”

The ‘you shouldn’t’ laid unspoken between them.

 

* * *

 

“I don't want your fucking coin,” Billie snarled to herself, slamming the package on top of a table. She crumpled up the accompanying letter, before smoothing it out and glaring at the parchment.

It was an exceedingly polite letter, all things considered. It was addressed to a ‘Miss Meagan Foster,’ had the imperial seal and everything. No snide mention of Miss Foster’s true identity, no reference to those long nights they had spent together while the Dreadful Wale sailed back to Gristol. Nothing about the way the empress had arched her back, moaning the name Meagan.

“I thank you for your excellent service to the Empire, for aiding I, Emily Drexel Lela Kaldwin, First of Her Name, the true empress, in reclaiming my rightful throne…”

It was all upper-class nonsense, probably written in her office while she discussed important stately matters with the new High Overseer, while her Royal Protector watched from the corner. They probably both thought that humble ship captain Meagan Foster was a simple subject proud to serve the crown.

Billie almost wished that Emily would have sent assassins after her, or even better, chased after Billie herself, intent on revenge. Billie wouldn't even fight back; the empress would be righteous in her fury.

The entire time they were together, in the weeks it took to reach Dunwall, Billie was consumed by guilt. She knew how terrible, unforgiving, it was to hold the empress, kiss her, fuck her, all while Emily had no idea who she really was. Emily had assured her time and time again that she wanted this, wanted Meagan. But she knew Emily’s lust (love?) would change once she knew that there was no Meagan Foster. Just a liar.

Billie had agonized over the decision, but knew she couldn't let Emily walk out of her life without knowing the truth. After all she went through, the pain Billie herself had caused, Billie owed it to her.

_You helped Daud kill my mother._

Emily had shut down, eyes unblinking. She stared at Billie, glancing at her right arm like always.

_My name is Billie Lurk._

Billie half-expected her to struck her down then and there. But Emily was averse to violence, only resorting to killing when necessary. Exacting revenge on the ally of her mother’s assassin was apparently not necessary.

Billie thought that was the end of it. An awkward goodbye, where Emily didn't exactly forgive her, but didn't tell her she was a monster either. Emily defeated her aunt and resolved to heal her empire, while Billie shed her false name and left to find her old mentor, to finally get some closure on that chapter of her life.

And yet a courier chased her down, claiming a package of utmost importance all the way from the empire’s capital. Billie wished she followed the impulse to throw it into the sea.

Reluctantly, she opened the package, filled with a multitude of coins and a couple gold and silver ingots. Enough to finally properly fix her ship’s engine, which Billie had no intention of doing. Her life as a ship captain was over.

But before she stormed off into the direction of her bedroom (the one she had taken over where the empress once slept, because Billie was clearly a masochist), she saw that in between the pile of coins laid another sheet of parchment. No imperial seal, just a simple page folded over. She pulled it free and shakily opened it.

 

_Billie,_

_I won't pretend to know what you're doing. My agents have told me that your ship has fallen into disrepair, even more than usual, and that it's anchored in the unsavory parts of Karnaca. Sokolov is gone and I know you must be feeling terribly lonely once again._

_I realize I haven't handled our last night together with as much tact as I should have. I'm not pleased with what you have done, but I am grateful that you have decided to tell me. I know it would have been much easier for you to pretend that you were only a ship captain who happened by my cause._

_That said, I'm glad I became closer to you. I don't regret the time we spent together. I don't hate you, even though I miss my mother terribly. Maybe there's something wrong with me for feeling this way, but I'm tired of being weighed down by the past._

_Once you're done with whatever it is you're doing, please come visit me in Dunwall. I know things won't be the same again, but I'm hoping we can figure out something new. Together._

_Yours,_  
_Emily_

 

She’d gone completely mad. Essentially apologizing for not being tactful when Billie _admitted involvement in her mother’s assassination_. She was always an odd one, Billie thought, bemused.

Tonight Billie was following a lead on the Albarca Baths. She wasn't entirely sure how her life would progress tomorrow, or if it would even continue.

She held onto that parchment tightly. She thought that once she finished with this, a change of weather did sound nice. The capital wouldn't even be cold this time of year.

Billie was also tired of the past.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was entirely inspired by the beginning part of Death of the Outsider where you find a letter from Billie, addressed to Emily, about how she doesn't want her money. It went from being exceedingly formal (Empress) to more casual (Dear Emily), and expressing frustration. There's also a part of Billie's travel log where she mentions that Emily was pretty forgiving of her crime. I've been meaning to write a fic with this pairing but those little details are what finally kicked my ass into gear.
> 
> Thanks for reading and check out [my tumblr](http://souldiertotheend.tumblr.com)!


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